Comic Updated September 26, 2008
The open plains, quiet introspection, and, yes,
a fart joke. Way to write 'em, younger Norm.
Throughout most of my life, I've been a console
gamer. It was never a conscious decision, I just gravitated to consoles out
of simplicity of setup and a preference for gaming on a large screen, from
a comfortable chair. I've PLAYED PC games, but I've never gone out of my
way to get a gaming 'rig,' as it were, and on such occasions where I've had
the choice between a console or PC version, the console version has won out
But I like PC games. I've WANTED to be a
PC gamer. PC gamers want me to be a PC gamer.
Well, all right, PC gamers don't really care
if I'm a PC gamer or not, they just want me to admit that PCs are
better game machines than consoles. For instance, from time to time,
I've spoken to PC gaming evangelists and read PC/console game comparisons,
and one thing they'll always mention is that, owing to the PC's scalable
nature, PC game graphics will always have the edge over
When I was young I took this information at face
value, and thus I was immensely surprised when I watched a friend playing
"Quake" and noticed that while the game had undeniably sharper visuals than
the stuff I was playing on the original Playstation, the framerate was apparently
set to "intermittent." I asked him about it.
"Well, yeah, PCs are better for games -- I just
need a little more RAM in my system.*"
I pointed out to him, at this juncture in the
conversation, that regardless of which was the better machine in theory,
HIS computer was not, at that moment, proving his point. He conceded
that, all right, his current computer wasn't doing the job, but if he
had a system tuned to the proper settings, with the proper equipment, then
it would beat the Playstation hands-down.
"But you don't," I said.
"I will," he said. He believed it,
The perfect gaming PC exists CONSISTENTLY only
in theory. It actually pops up, from time to time, in the real world, but
it costs ten-thousand dollars and a kidney and is almost immediately
rendered obsolete by the next, MORE-perfect gaming PC. Yet this is still
the standard PC gamers adhere to, this mythical, wholly unquantifiable box.
I'd like to propose, for purposes of reviews if
nothing else, a set of industry-standardized gaming PC specs, updated annually.
The perfect gaming PC doesn't exist, but I think with a little work, the
average one could. The PC camp has been looking for a way to bring the lapsed
and frustrated PC gamers back into the fold, this would be a good start.
Man, I haven't even BEGUN to talk about this.
*This is equivalent of saying, "I
think I could do with just a touch more
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