I am very pleased to present the first dynamic, action-packed and uncharacteristically short (in the 'challenged-of-height' sense) installment of the current webcomic series, Violence Man in... "Scarred Straight." Fear not, the next two panels are taller.

As I write this, it's August 29th, and school's in for nearly all of the poor, downtrodden studentry of North America, myself included. If I might make a request for any of my school-age readers in this particular region of the world -- be sure, before this year's out, that you can find the United States on a world map, all right? According to new research, 20% of American students haven't mastered that particular skill, and while it might not be the most practical ability to have, it's still good P.R., so, you know, make an effort this year. If it's too daunting, start by trying to find the United States on a U.S. map, and then work your way out.

If this works out, next year, we'll look for Canada. Which might be the same country as Greenland; I'll have to do some research.

So, my classes -- English Composition 2, English Literature, Speech Communications, and Business Law. We're just starting the second week of each, and I still can't tell if any of these are going to be ridiculously easy, or ridiculously hard. Not a lot of gray area, this time around, and I think I attribute that viewpoint to my bein' out in the world, so to speak, for the last nine years. You learn a lot of stuff when you're out, just livin', but you also tend to take whatever knowledge you gain while doing so and basically cement it in place so it doesn't start rattling around in there when you hit a bump.

English Composition, for instance. Now, I been writing for as long as I can remember, and in terms of peer comparison, I'm pretty good at it -- even managed to get some out in the public sector from time to time. But it's none of it what we'd consider COLLEGE English, and while here I can write such charming, folksy phrasings as "I been writing" instead of "I've been writing," the chances of my new professor appreciating my subtle wink-and-nod at our beloved language without comment or censure are slim, especially given the fact that any number of my new classmates, from a cursory glance, would sincerely consider "I been writing" to be a sterling example of the Queen's English.

English Literature -- well, no big problems, there, except that a third of it's poetry, and, Lord help me, there's little I find more tedious than poetry. Except, of course, for people APPRECIATING poetry, which is basically what the class is all about, so my biggest hurdle, there, is going to be a constant struggle to keep my mouth shut. Stupid poetry.

Speech is, well, I understand it involves preparing and giving speeches. Only had one class in it, thus far -- I'll report back later.

Business Law is proving to be the most-interesting and, unfortunately, most-challenging of the classes. There's always a catch. Lots of potentially-useful information, but also lots of memorization of near-identical concepts and terms. The class is headed by an older, Jewish lawyer who has an endearingly-corny sense of humor that is tempered, most unfortunately, by a poor memory, leading to double helpings of such gems as, "Old lawyers never die, they just lose their appeal."

Anyways, that's the first update from Good Ol' College Norm -- watch this space, (probably early-ish next week -- still trying to get up to normal production here) for the next installment of "Scarred Straight."

Norm's Link-o-th'-Moment:
Drew's Script-O-Rama
Home of the original, better "Day of the Dead" script!



Check out Hsu and Arnie in an EGM reprint, "Wrested Peace," in the archive!

All content copyright 2007 (or earlier-like) Jeremy "Norm" Scott, all rights reserved.